Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
