Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
