If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize
