It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
