Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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