birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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