man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
