I'm really into asian looking animals
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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