Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize