so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
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