Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
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