Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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