Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
