come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize