Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
