Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize