I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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