She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Randomize