I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
