he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
