so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
