it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
