What a fucking waste of an outfit
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
