Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
no more duck duck goose at the bar
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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