tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize
