Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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