What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize