so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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