he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
