So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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