omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize