Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Randomize
