He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
