I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
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