I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
