Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize