Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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