OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
did i just pee glitter
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
