Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
