Your dad touched me again.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Randomize
