I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
