these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
