I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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