i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
