just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
