Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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