Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
