i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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