ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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