Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize
