Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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